The WIFM Factor

     When we, as humans, are plunged into a situation that feels really challenging, it can be really hard to remember that, as we are slogging (or dancing, when we can) through the situation, we are actually receiving very important benefits.

     What is the WIFM factor?  For those of us who have not worked in corporate sales, WIFM stands for What's In It For Me?  The reality is: everybody thinks about the WIFM factor; it's how we're hard-wired, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with it.  The funny thing is, right when we can benefit the most from considering WIFM, we are often blinded by the appearance of difficulty or obstacles.  This seems to be true for so many tools - right when we need them the most, part of us resists collaboration with said tool (journaling, excercize, taking quiet time for personal reflection, etc).  For this reason, I suggest writing a list of all the tools which can be helpful in nourishing a more positive and productive outlook - this can be your tool chest which you can refer to when you're feeling down.

Now, back to the WIFM!  Quick - if you could change any one thing about your situation right at this moment, what would it be?  If you can change it, great, but if not, it's time to look for the WIFM!  The most important thing to keep in mind is that no hardship ever ever ever shows up without gifts.  And the more painful the hardship, the more crucial the gifts.  Not that you can't also receive important gifts without experiencing painful hardship - you can!  But something about those hard-won gifts - they're usually preparing/provisioning you for an absolutely incredible future opportunity you couldn't have even imagined before. 

When you see yourself persevering through a difficult time, you learn that you are stronger than you thought you were; that you have inner resources you didn't really believe that you had.  One way that we gain faith in ourselves and our abilities is by surprising ourselves by meeting difficult situations with style and grace.  We are able to look back and say, "Damn, I made it through fill-in-the-blank, I can definitely handle this!  This isn't even a problem", which will allow you to take on challenges which you might never have considered approaching otherwise.  You might have previously assumed  an opportunity to be out of your league, but by gaining faith in yourself and your abilities, you are able to reap rewards that enrich your life in a myriad of ways.

Even if you don't feel brave 100% of the time (and who does??), the fact that you are holding your head high as you put one foot in front of the other through a difficult time means that you are brave.  Everyone who has ever read any faerie tales (which were primarily created to convey certain cultural and mythic truths) knows that the brave one reaps the rewards!  Imagine yourself as the brave hero of your own tale, striking out on your challenging path which leads to personal development and ultimately, abundant bounty in many forms.

What gifts can you notice you are already beginning to receive on your path?  What gifts would you like to cultivate on this journey?  You are the hero of this tale, but you're also a co-author, so, given the challenging aspects of your current adventure, and the admirable bravery with which you progress, what gifts do you feel would be appropriate?  My invitation of the week is to fully explore this question for yourself.  Simply put, what do you want?